Wondering. Dreaming with my eyes wide open, I am. I wish things were a little different. I want to change them, but I cannot. I am not asking for much, but just those few wishes, I dream of them, sometimes of the gardens, I had walked before in, of the gates I have walked through. Almost, always looking back.
Do I like the present or the past, but I really do not want to live in the past. But, then again, it had its moments, I miss them. My mind is full of dreams, dreams of a wonderful future, dreams of a beautiful present, and yes, dreams of the haunting past too. I cannot choose, which I like best, I do not want to, anymore. We'll watch it, as it unfolds, be a part of it, even.
Some things never change, and we are glad of it. Like those, times, when we used to sit and blabber on into the night, all those times we laughed, and all those people who made us laugh. Like those sunsets, I would watch, at almost every hill station, wishing for the moments to be captured in my mind.
My mind's eye can still see them. Like those beaches I went to, like those sea shells I collected, like this castles I built, in the sand and in the air. Like those thoughts, which would come to me, and stay on as dreams. The book stores, I went to. All those books, I bought, to help me build my castles further. To help me breathe in the fragrance a little longer, to touch and feel the very essence of all those thoughts.
To see it come to life, the very thought, that very feeling, to hear the sounds of laughter, the sounds of grief, and the sound of silence. To have me look on into the distance, and still see those very thoughts come to life. I dream on, then, because they are all I have to hold on to. To help me, through it all. To help me see the sun, rise again.
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