New roads and old...

Here we are again! Crossroads! I've got to be the only one who visits them so often. While it remains to be seen how soon I am gonna walk on again, I sit by the corner looking at the road behind. What am I leaving behind, what happened and why? As all answers are, even these remain elusive. Philosophy is a wonderful thing, I manage to find an explanation or an excuse for everything that ever happened. But never the answers.

I try and leave the past behind but there are too many loose ends there which refuse to be knotted. I have to understand, to know to really move on, otherwise it just is forgiven but never forgotten. My obsession with the fact that everything has to make sense has not made much to sense to many I know. Its about feelings, or emotions, unexplainable, unscientific and illogical. While I do agree with them to an extent, I still like to think back in steps and find the exact point, the exact moment something happened and why. It allows me a perspective to life and the sense in it calms me. Its a lesson learnt and allows me to understand myself and people around me. Or else its only restless and helplessness that I feel. (How logical is that. haha. )

Then again, I have learnt that everything cannot be explained and sometimes its really not my own fault. So I will soon take one of those new roads , a road not taken perhaps this time. I will go, but I will always look back wondering, what if. But I hope I find one reason to go back down the road I came from, because it was a wonderful road, full of memories and happy times. While I am sure the new road will give me something to look forward to, there is something about that path which calmed me. So here's to the road which I walk away from and also to the road I run to.